Aesthetic(s)
This is my left arm on any given day, for the last hmmm 10yrs. Yes all 110 of them. I wear them all the time. I started off with 20 and they have gained substance over the years.
I get the weirdest attention from them. Yesterday on my way to work this random dude PLEADED with me to give him just one. Please mistress, he called after me, I’ll pay you. Those are from The Mother landed, he informed me, and proceeded to pull out his wallet as I walked steadily on. I’ve been offered loads of $....you have so many, they rant on, plus I’ll pay you $XXX. Yaaaaaani they best be lucky money doesn’t move me. Then I get KENYANS asking me to give them one. OR even worse…where did you get those? This oft times insults me to the very core…wuusaaaaaaaaah. And theeeeeeeeeen if I ever go missing and or suddenly face east and keel over, check my friends wrists…some of them are questionable and have called dibs on my bracelets.
I get really weird questions and or comments about my bracelets. This lady asked me if it bothers me to have them on. I really had to control my being on this one. Does it bother me? Yeah, sure that’s why I wear them EVERYDAY!!! Maybe I misunderstood her Q or twas a case of communication break-down.
I told another that bracelets are to me what hair was to Samson or I’d have an Achilles moment without the source of my power…go figure!
People also always want to know the significance. So here’s a list of ten of the reasons I’ve used and gotten PRICELESS conversations/laughter from:
• My conquests
• The number of orgasms I’ve had in my lifetime…jaw dropper. Catches most unawares
• The number of (insert animal of choice here depending on my analysis of asker) that my suitor will HAVE to pay my parents before asking for my hand in marriage. This one is a great conversation keeper
• The number of women I can share my husband with
• The number of whips/beatings my husband/father/brother can give me if I fall out of line
• My worth…i.e. land and or money that I’ve to my name BACK HOME
• My ancestors. I add and or remove one with every birth/death of a family member
• The number of hairs (that doesn’t sound like correct English, but I’ll go with it) that have to plucked from my head when a male member of my family passes on
• I add one every time I fart in public and cause a commotion
• When I still had 20, I’d say the number of dates I have to go on before letting dude go to first base
I'm running out of stunners and open to suggestions...
Labels: Gullible
posted by Quintessence @ 1:00 PM
14 Comments:
sii you give me one like this from the mother LANDED.(as I run away at the speed of lightning!)Kwani where did the mother landed?
I must say, your left hand looks beautiful and those reasons you give people for wearing them- very nice.
@3toc...LOL, kwani you were marktiming...I'm still editting bana!
Ta man...
i like one about,dowry and worth.
So now I have to go on 110 dates with you kabla...
Those are very interesting conversation starters for sure.
ati the number of hairs you have to pluck from your head..lol. Nice collection you have, I'm not good at maintaining accessories/jewelery except for earrings.
nice sisy, nice! I'm just at a loss for words, if i think of any to make u add on i shall return
happy wknd
p.s. I must say you're simply *unique*
p.s.s. could i please call dibs on them too??lol I kid
aki i love beads and i jus love such bracelets..i have lots too and i aint giving up even one for a million bucks so i feel u!
enyewe ure hand looks pretty :)..number of orgasms?lool WOW
@Gish...it seems to be a fave
@EGm...for you, I might be convinced to do a special...half off, LMBAO
@Wambui...me either. This is the extent of mine...they are very low maintenance
@Prettylyf...tee hee, pick a number and join the queue
@Betty...I'm on a mission to start a collection for my hips. Ta, I didn't realize how pretty till I took these photos.
I WISH...on the orgs.!!!
Q, you jazz me too much. I probably would have been asking whether they are not uncomfortable at times – dumb me.
Anyway do you ever see yourself without them, say if there were interfeering with your sex life – don’t ask me how plz- ama your husband to be doesn’t like them?
I too love them, I have one lakini on my left one! I cherish it mbaya!
Ati u have had them 4 10 years?? That's awesome!!
@3N...I'd've given you that ans.
tee hee, I don't know what the future holds so...bila idea
I took them off once(late last yr) when I went to the ER coz I didn't want em stolen, cut or whatever and stayed w/o for like a month and ppl who know me would look at me all weird
WAIT if hubby to be doesn't like them then he can hit the road man...that's too much drama
@Klara...mine are on my left arm too, did I say otherwise
Yes ma'am!
Yeehaa!!! Off to work on the pitch that'll convince you :)
Man, those are A LOT of beads! I had a pal who also started a collection about ten years ago as well. Haven't seen her in ages so I don't know how far she's got. Might that be you?
So when (if ever) do you take them off? To shower? Sleep? Don't worry, I'm not planning to jack you. Just curious.
I like the reasons, especially #1 and 3.
@Egm...I WANT 10 good ones before you can get one...start working (Whip)
@Archer...It is me I am the one...naaaaaaaaaah.
I never take them off! If you were planning to jack me you wouldn't...I sleep with one eye open...
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